Still remember...

this story that took place about 7 or 8 years ago. At the time my late mama just started her first semester with IDEAL UPM, and because it was an e-learning program, all the students must have a valid email account. I helped her create a yahoo email account and taught her how to login etc...

Then one day, she was on the phone with one of her course mate..

Mom: can.. i just login to my email account...

Mom: how come you got error.... i can get in... i'm already in my yahoo account...

Mom: just type in www.com.my... and you'll get the yahoo page, wait.. i'll ask my daughter... Sofia?!

Me: ye ma.. what is it?

Mom: my friend tried to create an email account but she cannot get the yahoo page..

Me: ask her to type in www.yahoo.com.my

Mom: Yes.. see, my daughter said to type in www.com.my

Me: MA..?! its www.yahoo.com.my

Mom: ya la.. www.com.my...

Me: www.YAHOO.com.my...

Mom: eh my mistake.. it should be www.yahoo.com.my... u got it..? ok.. sorry about that..

Me: HAHAHAHA...!

Mom: Dekat dah la tu... www.com.my dgn www.yahoo.com.my.... *smiling away*..


miss u ma..

Balqis aka B1 Part 1

Tadi masa budak2 balik dari KAFA, both of them were excited...

B1: Ma.. kakak kena baca sajak nanti..

Me: Ok kak..

B2: Adik kena nyanyi...

Me: Nasyid kot...

B2: Haah nasyid.. ma tengok ni.. (showing me the lyrics) nanti ma tolong nyanyi ok..?

Me: (looking through the lyrics) ma tak tau nasyid ni adik..

B2: Habis tu mcmana adik nak nyanyi? adik kena nyanyi...

Me: Nasyid...

B2: Ha nasyid.. mcmana adik nak nasyid kalau adik tak tau

Me: Kakak, tolong ajar adik (assuming that the nasyid had been taught in school)

B1: Akrab Persahabatan..? Eh mana kakak tau lagu ni...

B2: Alaa ma.. mcmana ni..?

Me: Tak ajar ke dekat sekolah tadi..?

B1: Alaa bukan susah dik.. gi ambik laptop dacik..

Me: buat apa laptop dacik?

B1: bukak youtube la... mesti ada punya...!

True enough... ada...

(why didnt i think of that??) me being IT literate dah dikalahkan oleh budak 9 taun.. malu.. malu.. hahahaha

Nama jari..

Baru tadi teman disoal oleh anak2, apa nama each jari yang ada... B2 yang tanya, so teman pun jawap la... jari telunjuk, jari hantu, jari manis, jari kelingking and ibu jari...
Sekali B1 bagi soalan cepumas... kenapa jari manis nama dia jari manis..? kakak rasa tak manis pun...
Adeh..!! Pernah ke kita tau apa maksud disebalik nama2 jari ni? Well I dont... so i have to think fast!! Come on Sofia.. think think!! ok... got it..

jari jari montok ku... ahaks..

Me: Laaa kakak, mana ada jari rasa manis... nama jari tu jari manis sebab jari tu la orang sarung cincin.. so tangan kita nampak manis la.. sebab ada cincin... (hahahaha belasah ajer..)
B1: Ooooo so jari telunjuk ni nama dia sbb kita tunjuk la ye..?
Me: haah...
B2: Jari hantu pulak..? kenapa nama jari hantu..?
Me: (adeh.. apa aku nak jawap ni... ) hmm hantu ni ada guna tak..?
B1: mana ada guna... nak takutkan orang ade la..
Me: sama la dgn jari ni... nama jari hantu sebab tak banyak guna sangat... (abih la.. ajaran sesat nih)
B1: oooo ok... jari kelingking...? sbb jari kecik ye mama..?
Me: haah.. sbb jari kecik.. yang ni (showing my thumb) nama apa..?
B2: err taktau...
Me: ni nama dia IBU jari... ibu ni penting tak..?
B1 & B2: penting la.. mcm mama..
Me: (Pergh!! bangga kejap! hahhahaha) ha.. jari ni penting.. sbb tu dia panggil ibu jari... cuba angkat bekas air tak guna ibu jari.. susah tak..?
B1 & B2: *try angkat* haah la ma.. susah...
B1: oo patut la nama dia ibu jari... jari yg paling penting rupanya...
Me: haah.. mcm mama jugak.. (Hahahahaahha tak nak kalah!)



** So.. sapa tau exactly apa maksud nama jari2 ni..? please... tell me..

Ma...are you happy..??

*WARNING* - Read only if you have the time... panjang berjela siut.. hahahaha

B2 asked me that question last night. It's something that has to do with what happened that day at school.. Lets recap... jDid I tell you that B2 is already in std 1? Well, she is.. how time flies. Still remember the day she was born...she was.. eh.. thats a different story.. Anyway, a lot has happened to her during these pass few month, most of it, not good... Kesian anak mama... :( Let me start with how's life has been since she's been to school... After 2 setengah bulan, life is quite hectic, sbb 1st time the school buat 2 sessions. So agak kelam kabut mula2. But then it was ok. But being B2... dia dah ilangkan buku teks sekolah, hilang kasut and tetukar kain sekolah (but managed to get both back), had to buy new sets of shoes (she's outgrown the ones we bought end of last year, NO, apa pulak kitaorg beli kecik, tak de la, she's grown ok.. quite fast...imagine from size 9 shoes to 12!! YES, I'm not kidding... sheesh...), had to buy her new bag (dia dah patahkan beg roda dia by end of feb...yes really!) had to cut her hair sebab ada sikit colour.. (my bad.. hehehe)...and was transferred to another class... :( sian anak mama. Actually, dekat sekolah tu, bila std 1, they dont divide the students according to kepandaiannya... they mix them. After 1 month, they'll do some test then for those who failed the 3M.. (Membaca, Mengira and Menulis) must move to 1 class.. 1B. (1 Bestari...but it's like 1 Bodoh/Bangang/Bengap class to me... but thats a different story.. ). So my precious daughter ni... she's clever, ada banyak akai upstairs, but... dia slow nak membaca. She can read, but very2 slow... kena eja dulu, then baru boleh baca. Tu pun lagi slow dari kura2, but she's trying very hard. She's a little bit better now, but still a lot of work to do. Ok, then nak jadi cerita... one day she was tested by her class teacher (she was in 1D - Dedikasi and was elected penolong ketua class, imagine her excitement and she was the happiest girl around)...utk baca, dia tak boleh, sbb cikgu kata 'Jangan eja, just baca'. Then she said.. i cannot. So the teacher said, 'Awak kena pindah class'. She was sad... really2 sad. (uhuk.. sian anak mama). But then her teacher said 'tak pe la, awak duduk dulu, nanti susah pulak saya nak cari penolong ketua class baru'. B2 felt very2 relieved. Being her, the incident was forgotten and dia belajar as usual, getting A's and A++ in her exercises...being a good leader (penolong ketua class kan.. hehehehe), but it was only for 1 week. Her teacher tested her again, asked her to read... this time she cried. :'(. (You see, B2 ni eventhough she's a little bit rough (she can play with boys ok..!) she's quite sensitive, tak boleh org marah or angkat suara for no reason. So her teacher ni was quite strict la.. and garang.). Bila jadi mcm tu, cikgu tu kata, 'esok awak masuk kelas B'. Siap panggil B1 and bagitau 'Esok awak bawak adik awak masuk kelas B, jangan masuk class D dah'. Imagine B2 feelings masa tu, sian dia.. :((. Still remember the look on her face masa dia bagitau, 'Ma, adik kena tukar kelas'. And all I said was, 'Adik, i told you, u must learn to read fast.. and learn harder, tak boleh malas2'. (She's a little bit malas and suka curi tulang when i asked her to read, like i said, dia ni banyak akai.. hehehe). She was devastated, and i didn't help a bit. But i did say to her, 'adik, its ok kalau masuk class B pun, u can learn to read, n then u'll be better. It's ok'. Tapi as a kid, bila dah selesa satu tempat, then you have to change masuk class lain, it's like going to a new school la. She was reluctant to go to school the next day, and she was ready to quit school. Imagine that!! :( Sian dia, but then i said to her, 'adik masuk dulu class B tu, then ptg nanti bila adik balik, adik bgtau mama mcamana, kalau adik tak suka esok mama gi jumpa cikgu adik and explain'. Dengan B2, senang kita nak tolerate (kalu B1, argghh tension!), so she agreed. Dlm pala dok ligat fikir, what if dia tak suka...then how? But alhamdulillah she was ok, so she started in her new class early Feb. Selalu jugak, bila balik rumah, B2 would say 'ma, tadikan kawan adik dekat class semua tiru adik buat kerja' or 'ma, budak2 lain semua tak tau buat ma, semua suruh adik ajar'. I was like, ok... maybe B2 dah belajar masa tadika, so dia boleh buat la kot...takkan la budak class tu that stu**d kan? after all it's only writting ABC, 123. But to my horror, mmg pun.. and my daughter was in that class. Oh My..! Tapi what else can i do, cikgu2 dah tested her, and since B2 tak boleh one of the M (membaca) she was transferred to the class. Then i thought, tak pela, let her learn from scratch... Sebulan dah berlalu, it's time for exams. Me being very lazy and on a roller coaster.. didn't help the kids at all, except for suruh belajar. :( Truk mak dia nih.. :(. Exam start last tuesday 9/3, first paper was BM 1 and BM2 + spelling. I didn't expect much from B2, sbb i dont really know whether exams yang dia dapat, sama tak dgn class2 lain.. yela.. being in 'that' class kan.. maybe different exams. So biar aja la.. Guess what? Yesterday she came home and said, 'Ma, I have surprise for u' Me: ye ke? apa dia? B2: mama teka la.. Me: hmmm adik dapat 100 utk peksa..? B2: tak la.. tak tau lagi peksa dpt berapa... teka la lagi.. Me: hmm adik betul semua spelling?? B2: tak la.. tak tau jugak.. Me: dah tu..? adik ckp aje la.. B2: tadi masa lepas adik dah buat peksa English, cikgu lama adik datang ambik kertas peksa adik tu, lepas tu dia bagitau adik, 'Bazleen, esok awak masuk kelas lama balik, 1D' Me: *VERY SURPRISE!!!* Betul ke adik..?? B2: Haah.. betul.. cikgu class baru pun cakap mcm tu dkt adik... Me: Yeke? Alhamdulillah... I hugged her n said.. 'good for you adik..' :) B2 was beaming with joy, jumping around...the happiest girl on earth i think.. hehehe Today, she's not happy, banyak perkara telah berbangkit dalam kepala dia. Like, what if the teacher ask me to read again? what if the exams are different and i cannot do anything..? will they put me back in B class? etc2.. Kesian B2, baru sekolah 3 bulan, macam2 konflik timbul.. dah elok settle dlm class 1D, cikgu gi drop bomb shell and said, she's not qualified enough to be in that class.. she felt very low and down and not to mentioned stupid (dia bgtau.. sian anak mama). Then when dia dah terima kenyataan that she's in B class... the teacher gi tukar balik masuk D class... what the H**K? I know she's been effected mentally, she's already accepted that dia x pandai (or so cikgu kata :P, i always say that dia pandai...and she is actually) cikgu naikkan balik dia masuk class lama, and bg B2, dia dah ketinggalan banyak subject (ye la, dlm class B dok belajar ABC and 123 je... yes really!) and mcmana dia nak cope? sian B2. How can sekolah buat mcm ni? Playing with budak2 umur 7 taun emotionally mcm ni? Dah dia tak nak pegi sekolah tadi... puas pujuk..Alhamdulillah dia pegi jugak. And hopefully she'll be ok... InsyaAllah... This time, if they pindahkan dia balik masuk 1B... i'm going to the kementrian terus.. I DONT CARE..! Oh, back to the question, which was asked by B2 last nite regarding her being upgraded to her old class.... Of course adik.. mama is happy. I'm happy when u r happy, even if u r in B class, i dont care.. u r my daughter, if u r happy, then I'm Happy too... :) Luv u adik... so much... I luv u 2 mama.... Muahhh! I'm in HEAVEN!! hehehehe

A treat for B2, lunch at McDonalds before going to school... kekonon utk hilangkan rasa nervous dia la.. (look at her face... cuak je muka.. sian anak mama ni..)

Nenek ni pun tak nak kalah.. nak bergambar jugak.. :P TQ kakak sbb tengok2 kan adik... Muahh!

Love Languages...

When i first heard about Love Languages it was in the year 2007, when the company my hubby worked for planned a trip to the Kid's Lab. Basically its about how kids interpret that we love them. There's a book about it by Dr Gary Chapman titled 5 Love Languages. Anyway, its not just about kids and us, ada jugak pasal we and our partner etc etc. Check out his 5 Love languages site. Its interesting to know sebenarnya how your kids interpret your love to them. Kita selalu dengar yang ada org mengadu, mak dia tak sayang dia, mak dia sayang si polan lebih, asyik2 mak layan dia aje.. gitu2 la. Ada kan..? Ni semua ada kena mengena dgn 5 Love Languages ni la. Basically the 5 are:

1. Quality Time - spend quality time with them..
2. Receiving Gifts - giving them gifts
3. Act of Services - cooking for them
4. Physical touch - hugs kisses..
5. Words of Affirmation - saying i love u..

So which one or two or even three, maybe four or all the above that your kids interpret as you love em? Dulu (in 2007) my interpretations were "No 2 or 3 tak jalan dgn my kids. 1, 4 and 5 yang the kids want from us. No 1 especially from their father."...Now it's different. For my eldest, she knows that I love her when its no3 and occasionally no5. But for my younger daughter, its no4 and no5...just that, and she's beaming already.. :).

Ok now is the tricky part, how do you know which one suits to which kids? Eh, soklan diperbetulkan, How do I know which one suits my daughters... Well this is how i evaluate em.. (i still haven't read the book, so main belasah jer ni. hahahahaha) really simple actually. Firstly...u must know bila ur kids are vulnerable, bila ur kids will open up to you and let you take care of em. My answer, masa dorang tengah sakit. :). Masa sakit, apa yg the kids nak kita buat dekat dia, then thats what yang tunjuk kata kita sayang dia. Secondly, how they treat you masa you sakit... :)

I noticed, when my eldest sakit, she wants me to cook for her, tak kisah la apa pun, toast ke, bancuh air ke.. anything la, itu yg dia nak. And when I'm sick, That's what she did to me, sediakan makanan, minuman... kemas2 rumah... so its definite no3 for her.. :). I tried saying i luv you to her, especially after she had 'shown her love' by 'servicing' me and she smiled ear to ear.. :) Such a sweet girl...Love you kakak... :)

Its easier with my 2nd daughter, she just loves hugging and kissing.. and saying i luv u all the time. In a way she's more expressive in showing how she would want me to show her that i love her... senang je dia ni.. and easily satisfied.. :) So cute... Luv u adik.. :)

Ok, last question.. do you know what's your love language..? I used to be one of the kids, yg rasa mak dia tak sayang dia.. (I know.. I know.. mama luv me very much.. :) ).. i've always wondered why... but now I know. So to everybody that i love.. or loves me.. PLEASE TAKE NOTE..!! HAHAHAHAHA
To show me that u love me, U MUST (muahahaha Must tu.. tak nak kalah siut hehehe) No4, No5 and No1.. if any one of it missing.. then i take it that u dont love me la...hahaha....
btw, even if no4 is on my list, i dont like doing it in public.. soo... lets get a room shall we... hahahahahaha

p/s - My late mom was not a hug person...say i luv u lagi la... thats why i felt so unlove before.. :( Sorry ma, i know now how much u luv me.. :( if only i knew it sooner..

Alkisah...

yg jadi tengahari tadi...waktu kami anak beranak tengah bising-bising dirumah, maknye tengah bising suruh anak-anaknye bersiap untuk ke sekolah, manakala anak-anaknya pulak sibuk dok dancing2 menggunakan selimut.. bersuka ria.. (apakah..?! ades..! nak peksa la budak2 oi... dok dancing2 pulak..!).
Ok2, balik pada cerita... serious mode ON...

Kehadiran sebuah kereta telah memarking dengan eloknya dihadapan rumah jiran (selang 2 buah rumah), lalu kelihatan seorang pemuda memasuki rumah itu. Dibukanya pintu pagar dan seterusnya ke pintu grill rumah...Diwaktu yang sama, didalam rumah ada seorang gadis, berusia lingkungan 18 tahun terdengar pintu grill sedang cuba dibuka. Dijenguknye melalui tingkap, namun tidak kelihatan apa2, tapi ternampak kereta yang tidak dikenali memarking di depan gate rumahnye...lantas dia menelefon bapanya dan bertanya. Bapanya memberitahunya supaya keluar ikut pintu belakang rumah...dan tunggu disitu sehingga dia menelefon gadis itu kembali.

Selepas meletakkan telefon, bapanya lantas menelefon polis. Polis tiba didepan pintu pagar, dan memasuki rumah itu untuk mencari pemuda itu. Pemuda itu dijumpai di bilik tidur utama, telah selesai menyelongkar kesemua almari dan laci2 dalam bilik berkenaan dan mahu pulang... IYE...!!! pemuda itu adalah pencuri, dan Alhamdulillah berjaya diberkas oleh polis. Sekian terima kasih..

Hei... tak tahan betul la.. selamba aje dia masuk rumah tu... and buat mcm rumah sendiri. Nasib baik la budak perempuan tu alert... kalu tengah tido..?? (Yah ... enan... take note!!). And that guy pegi sorang2 dia aje tau.. tak de teman... and dia park elok je dpn rumah. haih... mcm2 la skarang ni...

Exam week...

Both my kids will sit for Exams this week..for both schools, KAFA and Sek Kebangsaan. So busy week for me....

Do your best girls...!

Macam - macam....

persoalan yang timbul.. like, apakah sebenarnya yang berlaku? kenapa berfikiran atau berperasaan seperti ini? bagaimanakah ini terjadi? siapakah yang patut dipersalahkan? dan yang paling penting apakah yang harus dilakukan?

Iye...it's one of those days again, tapi makin kerap jadi dah nowadays. :(. Napa ye? Sebab PMS? Bukan... this feels more like menopause aje. (Hahaha macam bagus aje, macam la pernah lalu menopause ni) So extremelah the feelings. Teruk sangat ke my hormon ni? But i'm not even 40... Is it really possible..?

I can change from a goody2 person to a monster you've never seen before in split seconds... from someone who's tougher than a rock to a melted iron in a blink of an eye...why can't i fight these feelings? I want to fight it real bad...i really do, but i just cannot help it. Maybe you'll say, i should try harder or i didn't try hard enough...well i did..believe me i did..but the harder i tried...the worst i become...what's happening here?

Tak pernah stop berdoa, and mintak pertolongan Allah.. but it works only for a while...only when i'm free from my monthly due...how to deal with it when its the time of the month? the time when i feel the worst? Sometimes i feel like going betapa dkt gua mana2 so i wont hurt anybody...yup, its that bad.. Sesapa please help... :(.

Abg, my dearest hubby, thanks for being so understanding when i'm going thru it. U r the best!
Kids, i'm sorry for being so tough on u gals.. "Maafkan mama ye :("
To my sis (all of em) and my close friends...sorry if i ever hurt u in any way... u know i never mean any of it.. i just cant help myself.. please forgive me.. :(

I'm in a mess...real mess...

This is too tough for me to handle... Allah.. please give me strength..

p/s - now i think i know how mama felt when she was going thru this...

Aduhai Perot...

What's happening to my perut? Been acting on its own lately..Dunno what else to do... :(

My dear stomach... have mercy please..!

Bazleen aka B2.. part 1

One day, after one of our daily Maghrib jemaah prayers, we heard B2 du'a sendiri sendiri, quite kuat jugak. But not loud enough for us to hear clearly. So her dad decided to ask her... (i was listening nearby)

Pa: Adik... adik doa apa tadi?

B2: Ada la...

Pa: Cakap la dkt papa...

B2: Adik doa bagi papa dapat duit banyak2...

Pa: Ohh yeke? Kenapa nak duit banyak?

B2: So nanti papa boleh beli apa yg adik mintak...
(ooo ok... ada niat tersembunyi rupanya...)

Pa: Ok, lagi doa apa?

B2: Adk doa bg mama keja puas puas...
(aik... tak boleh jadi ni, i have to ask)

Ma: Keja puas puas? adik nk mama gi keja ke?

B2: Eh tak nak la.. adik nak mama dok rumah...

Ma: Abis tu, adik soh mama keja puas puas tu?

B2: Yela, mama keja la puas puas dekat rumah. bagi rumah bersih.. kemas...sedia makan... semua2 la...

Ma: Err... (speechless...tak tau dah nak kata apa)

Soulmates

Hahaha...apa punya topik ni? Start start dah merapu. But actually its quite an interesting topic to discuss when u really think about it. The main question, have you found your soulmates? I have... twice.. lucky me! hehehe
Ok, on a serious note.. what is the definition of soulmates? Googled it and found this: (these are 2 types of soulmates that really got my attention..)

Twin Flame Soulmates
This is the most popular type of soulmate. There is usually one twin flame soulmate for each of us. Twin flame soulmates have spent multiple lifetimes together in past lives. There is incredible chemistry and attraction towards each other. They "complete" each other and only few lucky people are able to find their twin flame soulmate. Twin flame soulmates, if separated, usually suffer enormous pain.

I found my Twin Flame Soulmates more than 10 years ago.. and of course, he's my best friend, the love of my life, my loving husband... Very2 lucky to have found him... (luv u abg..muah!)


Twin Soulmates
These types of soulmate are your closest friends or a person whom you really click with. According to those who believe in reincarnation, you have already met them in a past life, and in this life you are continuing the relationship. There is an emotional bond between these soulmates and each is able to sense the feelings of each other..

My 2nd soulmate found me by surprise... about a year ago..I was really shocked by her presence.. and really didn't know how to handled it. Allah has arranged everything...and I thanked Him for arranging this...I've found my Twin Soulmate... u know who u r... Tq for 're-entering' my life.. luv u lots...

So.. have you found your soulmates..?

I'm back..!

Sori ye blog... Lama betul tak jenguk...
It's been almost 7 month... lama tu.. :). A lot of things had happened, good and bad things.. oh! I've been hospitalized and operated on too, i think that's the main reason for the long silence..
Anyway, I'm back.. will be updating as frequent as I can..
So enjoy the nonsense rambling ... hehehe.. :P